Story Time with Dirty Lola

My Mission

Tue, 21 May 2013 15:47:32 -0400

I originally posted this in November of last year. I needed to go back and read it because I’ve been feeling a bit stuck, like i’m spinning my wheels and going no where, but in reality i’m moving towards my goal. I’m just moving slower than I’m used to. Here’s to progress! One baby step at a time!!

Certified Sex Encourager

Until I can call myself a Sex Educator I shall call myself a Sex Encourager. That’s basically what I do everyday. I talk about sex and encourage others to do the same. I believe in being sex positive. I don’t judge anyone for their Kinks. I want you to feel comfortable talking about what you want, need and desire from your sex life. Sex is just too good to hide away and pretend no one is having it.

I’m blazing a trail. Sex is a big part of my life. I talk about it. Everywhere. I’m not shy. I don’t blush when I say cock in public. Neither should you. When you can own your sexual identity, live it and not hide it then my work is done.

I may not know all of the facts but I know which direction to point you for some of your answers. Keep the emails and tumblr questions coming! As always I do my best to answer honestly.

I think you just need a hug...

Tue, 21 May 2013 12:38:08 -0400

I get lots of hugs. lol

Pondering and sharing

Mon, 20 May 2013 14:44:11 -0400

listen to ‘Pondering and sharing ’ on Audioboo

When the boss is away the Slutty Secretary will play. ;)

Fri, 17 May 2013 16:27:05 -0400

When the boss is away the Slutty Secretary will play. ;)

The Shoe is On the Other Foot: Hubby Dates

Mon, 06 May 2013 16:00:14 -0400

He hasn’t gone on a date yet but he has one planned. I’m excited for him. I’m excited for me. Hubby dating means we are growing and moving and that this hasn’t all been some crazy scheme cooked up by me to get my way. It means he’s really in this with me. All the way.

He’s been chatting up two wonderful ladies over the past two weeks or so and I’ve been enjoying the change I see in him. His confidence has blossomed and he is more playful. Its easier to talk to him about my other relationships. He feels different. In a good way. I no longer feel frustration radiating from his body. He seems happier. He seems more at peace.

Hubby’s new happiness would make other women feel uncomfortable and maybe even angry, but not me. I understand where it comes from. Its not easy for many to see the person they are madly in love with find a new happiness and peace in someone else. I watched Hubby struggle with this when I started dating, and I wondered if I would feel the same way. I wondered if I would struggle with his happiness when he found it. I can honestly say I am not struggling. I am filled with warmth and gratitude towards these women for giving him what I could not; that giddy feeling that only a new lover can give, the confidence that comes with the knowledge that you are desired by more than just your spouse, and most importantly the opportunity for him to explore our new openness first hand. No more standing in the wings watching me from afar.

I won’t lie. I have had my moments of frustration over the past two weeks. with Hubby’s new situation because I am the “understanding” spouse. There have been moments when he has failed to give me the same respect and courtesies that I have given to him over the past year in regards to our dating protocol. I’ve had to call him out on it and its caused a few heated arguments. I am being patient with him. He hasn’t had to go through all of this with me like I have with him.

We’re starting a new chapter in the book of us. I’ll keep you posted as much as I can. I’m sure we have many adventures ahead of us.

And Then I Was Drowning

Wed, 24 Apr 2013 15:47:28 -0400

I’ve nearly drowned twice in my life. Today as I made my way to work I was thinking how having your heart broken can feel so much like drowning…….

Things seem bright and shiny. The world feels warm and welcoming right before the panic settles into your chest. Slipping beneath the surface. Seconds seem like hours. Your mind races. Your body feels far away. A sad calmness settles over you. Then a hands you can’t see push you up. Other hands pull you out. You try to breathe but it still hurts. It hurts worse now than it did before but you keep trying to breathe because you have to. You must breathe. If you don’t breathe you can’t live. So you try again and again. Pushing past the pain until it fades. Then you breathe deep breaths and those breaths feel amazing. Even though you are aching inside you keep breathing and the world is bright and shiny again. Next time you’ll remember this. Next time you won’t dive in head first without knowing how to swim.

I’m breathing. It hurts but I’m breathing.

It has begun.

Tue, 23 Apr 2013 14:11:03 -0400

It has begun.

Is it bad that I still want you?

Tue, 23 Apr 2013 14:09:34 -0400

Hmmm That all depends on what you want. My soul is off limits.

She had to cum for him. Once. In each pair. Painting by the...

Tue, 16 Apr 2013 08:55:10 -0400

She had to cum for him. Once. In each pair.
Painting by the amazing @specksofcome

A Little Help for a Friend

Thu, 11 Apr 2013 12:46:00 -0400

A Little Help for a Friend:

I’ve know the amazing Essence Revealed for about a year now. In that time I have had the privilege of seeing her perform many times over. I can honestly say she’s blown me away each and every time. I wasn’t surprised when she told me that she had been chosen to compete at the Milan Burlesque Awards. I was surprised when she said she wasn’t sure if she would go because of the cost of traveling internationally.

This made me sad because she is an absolutely amazing burlesque performer and if anyone deserves to go it’s her. I felt and still feel that there are enough people out there willing to help her make it to Milan so she can bring back that award. I hope some of you fall into this category.

I never post things like this but I wanted to support Essence in any way I could. So I am making a donation and spreading the gospel of Essence Revealed. Watch the video. I know you will find her to be as amazing as I say and if you can, please donate. Thank you!

Click the blog title to link to Essence’s Indie Go Go page!

thejaymarz: This #rapeculture #endit This is what we as a...

Thu, 11 Apr 2013 11:32:44 -0400

thejaymarz:

This #rapeculture #endit

This is what we as a society need to step up and start doing. Seriously. I will be that bitch that tells you to step away from my drunk friend or any drunk girl in a bar. I really hope people see this and start acting accordingly.

I sing when I'm happy. I sing cause I'm free

Thu, 11 Apr 2013 10:25:54 -0400

listen to ‘I sing when I’m happy. I sing cause I’m free’ on Audioboo

Happy Lola :)

Tue, 09 Apr 2013 11:03:54 -0400

Today the sun is shining and its going to be a lovely day. I am smiling and I am happy. I can’t feel the sadness from a month ago. I remember it. I learned from it but I can’t feel it anymore. Its gone. In its place are joy, excitement and hope. I am still missing some things. Things that I want in my life again, but I no longer feel incomplete. I am still a sub and a baby girl with or without a Dom or Daddy. That doesn’t change just because a relationship didn’t work out. I just needed to remember that. I needed to remember that I have other ways of having my needs met. It takes a village. That has been so true in my life. Sometimes you can find what you need in that one perfect person. Sometimes you have to get it from many amazing people. In the end the source of your happiness isn’t truly what matters. What matters is that you are happy. I am happy. I want to bottle today’s happiness and save it for those days when I’m down. Maybe that’s what this post is. Bottled happiness. I can come back and read this and remember how glorious today felt simply because I was happy. My life is amazing. Sometimes I forget that. I will read this next time that happens.

I hope you are all happy. If not *HUGS* believe me when I tell you that the darkest nights lead to the brightest mornings. Your sun will shine again. Until then I’ll share mine. I’m shining bright enough for all of us.

I’m a little bunny!! I love my cute little Crystal...

Wed, 03 Apr 2013 22:25:22 -0400

I’m a little bunny!! I love my cute little Crystal Delights bunny tail butt plug. Next come the ears……. *Giggles*

I Got Stood Up And All I Got Was This Poem

Tue, 02 Apr 2013 21:19:38 -0400

I was stood up by a guy three months ago. He wrote me a poem. Yesterday. Here it is. Yes. I have permission to post this.

I saw a young lady on fet that I just had to get!
Introduced myself and pretty soon I was all set!
The plan was to meet in a public place!
Nowhere secluded for our first face to face!
A restaurant where we could eat dinner and talk kink
Maybe flirt with each other and grab a drink!
So the day came and I was on my way
Thinking if this works out..we’ll play!
Hopped in my truck and began to drive
Pretending to be fearless but still nervous inside!
I began to think the worst like, “What if I choke?”
“What if she doesn’t laugh or get my jokes?”
“What if she doesn’t find me cute? “
“What if dinner comes and suddenly I become mute?!!”
She called and said, “Hey I’m here!”
I replied, “Cool…I’m almost there!”
Shit…she’s there already?!!!!
Now I can’t even hold the wheel steady!
Ok so now I finally get to the spot
But instead of going in…I circle the block!
I looked through the window and saw her face
Sitting alone in front of an empty plate!
All I could think of while circling…
was how much prettier she was in person
I pulled my seat back and watched from my truck
Wanting to go inside but my legs were stuck!
Is that her husband watching from the second floor?
Are those her girlfriends sitting by the door?
Does she do this all the time?
Will she try to seduce me after the wine?
So many scenarios began to play out
I started to come up with some excuses…a way out!
Let me make up a story……what could I say?
To make her believe I absolutely couldn’t stay!
The phone rings and she yells, “Are you coming or not!”
And I say, “Hey can we reschedule? I can’t find a parking spot!”
DAMN….I DIDN’T HAVE THE BALLS!

Tue, 26 Mar 2013 16:45:53 -0400

Tue, 26 Mar 2013 16:45:12 -0400

Tue, 26 Mar 2013 16:43:12 -0400

Catalyst Con 2013

Tue, 26 Mar 2013 11:09:33 -0400

I wanted to write a wonderful piece on this event but for some reason i’m finding it hard to write down. So I’m going to oral blog it instead. That always seems to work. Look out for the audio boo later today! :)

Lola On Blog Radio

Tue, 19 Mar 2013 17:23:50 -0400

I was on Talk Sexcetera last week talking about swinging, my open marriage and polyamory. Here’s a link to the show. Enjoy!
http://www.blogtalkradio.com/wxrpradio/2013/03/14/talk-sexcetra